


Long Nights for the Sleep Deprived

by BonitaBreezy



Category: Final Fantasy X
Genre: F/M, Late Night Conversations, One Shot, Pre-Relationship, because I was reading 10 year old WIPs and kinda liked it, pre-Zanarkand, probably not, the calm lands, this is literally just me shooting off something in like an hour, will I ever get tired of writing about Auron and his feelings?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-31
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2019-02-24 11:01:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13212387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BonitaBreezy/pseuds/BonitaBreezy
Summary: Late at night in the middle of the Calm Lands, Rikku and Auron have a conversation.





	Long Nights for the Sleep Deprived

Rikku wasn’t sure what suddenly woke her.

One moment she had been sound asleep, exhausted from a long day of fighting and walking, and the next she was wide awake, staring at the back of Yuna’s head in the darkness.  Her cousin was still soundly asleep, one arm pillowing her head and the other hand tucked demurely under her chin.  From Yuna’s other side, she could hear Lulu’s tiny, breathy snores.

So, it hadn’t been them that had awoken her.  She listened intently for any sort of disruptions, but all she could hear was the loud sounds of Tidus’ snoring from the other tent and the crackling of the campfire, accompanied by the low murmur of voices.  She groaned quietly and shut her eyes, stubbornly clinging to the idea of sleep.

She laid there with her eyes closed, wide awake, for ten minutes before giving up and scooting carefully away from Yuna and pulling on her boots before slipping out of the tent.  Just because she couldn’t sleep didn’t mean that she should wake them up.  They had to be in tip-top shape, after all.

Outside the tent, the night was dark and cold with the hint of Gagazet’s wintery whisper.  The mountain loomed on the horizon, growing bigger and bigger every day.  With it, the pit of despair in Rikku’s stomach grew as well, and she took a moment to shoot a glare at peak, dark even against the black of the night sky.

The only point of light was the crackling fire Lulu had lit hours ago as the sun had started to set, about ten yards from the front of tents.  Wakka was there, shivering even though he sat so close to the fire she was surprised he hadn’t caught fire, and so was Auron, farther out.  He was standing with his back to the camp, staring out into the darkness of the Calm Lands, as if anyone could see anything more than a few feet into the inky blackness.  He turned, though, when Wakka spoke.

“Next watch doesn’t start for an hour, ya?” he said.

Rikku internally groaned at the realization that she’d only slept for three hours.  She was exhausted and she knew it.  If only her stupid brain would get with the program and let her actually sleep.

“You’re not on watch tonight,” Auron added, frowning at her. “You should rest while you can; we’re leaving at daybreak.”

“Yeah, I know,” she sighed. “But I can’t sleep.  Believe me, I really wish I could.”

Auron stared at her for a long moment and then nodded.

“Fine, you can keep watch with me.  Wakka, head to bed.”

Wakka didn’t need telling twice.  He groaned in relief and practically ran to the tent he shared with Tidus, bidding them a quick good night over his shoulder as he went.  Rikku stared after him, feeling almost like she’d been tricked into taking an extra watch.

But really, it was only an hour, and maybe the activity would help her fall back to sleep.

“Busy night?” she asked, strapping on her claw and trotting over to stand at Auron’s back.

She’d done the watch thing so many times by now that it was almost second nature.  It was easy to fall into a vigilant state, keeping her eyes on her half of the campsite.  She’d learned, over the weeks, to keep her senses open.  Her eyes could only do so much, but beyond the darkness she could hear the rustling of the tall grass and the echoes of the wind rushing through the Scar.  It seemed, for now, that all was quiet.

“No,” Auron said, confirming her suspicions. 

She shivered as the wind picked up, chilling her straight to her bones, and then backed a step closer to Auron.  Even with a foot of space between them, she could feel his body heat radiating off of him.  Casually, she pressed her back up against his, leaning a little of her weight on him.  He grunted.

“Don’t fall asleep on me,” he warned. “If I have to move, you’ll fall over.”

“I’m not,” she retorted, a little offended. “But you put off heat like a furnace and it’s freezing.”

“You’re not going to survive Gagazet, if you can’t handle this,” he said, sounding suspiciously amused.

“Hey!” she said, offended. “I’m tough, okay? I can take anything that stupid mountain can throw at me!”

It was all bluster, and she was pretty sure they both knew it.  She was terrified, pretty much constantly.  She had been since her Pops had kissed her on the top of her head and sent her out to save Yunie.  She’d grown up fighting fiends, of course.  Sanubia--and Spira as a whole--was a place where every kid grew up with a weapon in their hand.  But a pilgrimage was a bigger adventure than she’d ever imagined as a child.  And a pilgrimage where they were also on the run from Yevon?  Well...it was exhausting and terrifying, and Rikku had started to think of her own death in terms of being sooner rather than later.

If Yevon didn’t get them, Sin would.

“I know you can,” he said, making her pause in surprise. “You’re a very capable young woman.”

“I…” she said, hesitating for a moment to figure out if he was just teasing her.  When he didn’t say anything else, she relaxed against him even more. “Thanks.”

Auron stepped away suddenly, almost making Rikku topple head over heels.  She caught herself after a few stumbled steps and then craned her neck up to give him a betrayed glare.

“I warned you,” he said innocently, but she saw the smirk on his face before he managed to duck it behind the shield of his cowl.

“You’re so mean,” she pouted, but when he started to pace around the perimeter of their camp, she fell in step beside him.

She used the silence to try and think of new ways to save Yuna, a common watch pastime for her.  Unfortunately, most of her ideas seemed to rely on Yuna getting a whole personality transplant where she decided she didn’t want to fight Sin after all.  Not super helpful.  The problem was, she had no idea what was coming.  She only had vague notions of what it meant to reach Zanarkand and get the final summoning.  No one really knew, because the only people who had ever done it hadn’t lived to tell the tale.

Except…

“Hey Auron?” she said, and he grunted in response, laconic as usual. “Have you ever thought about trying to save the summoners? I mean...finding another way to defeat Sin?”

He was quiet for a long few minutes, and she was starting to think he was just ignoring her when he finally answered. “More than you know.”

“I...really?”

“Yes, Rikku,” he said, sounding suddenly tired.   And not just the sleepy kind of tired, but bone deep tired, like Old Lady Riza when she told Rikku stories about what life had been like for the Al Bhed before Home.  He sounded old and exhausted and very, very sad.

“Then…have you thought of anything?”

“No.”  He said it so quickly, so harshly, that Rikku flinched.  But her Pops had always said that Rikku was like a dog with a bone; she just didn’t know when to quit.

“But you’ve gotta know something,” she insisted. “You’ve been to Zanarkand.  You’ve seen the Final Summoning and fought Sin.  You’re the  _ only one _ , Auron, and if you don’t know…”

“I’ve been running this over in my brain every day for ten years,  Rikku,” he snapped. “Ten very long years.”

“Right,” she said, feeling chastised. “Sorry.”

She considered retreating across the campsite with her tail between her legs, but ultimately couldn’t resist taking just one more nibble at the bone.

“What’s it like?” she asked.

He looked at her warily, like he was afraid to respond, but then heaved a sigh and asked, “What?”

“Fighting Sin,” she asked, her voice small. “Is it scary?  I think it’ll be scary.”

She expected him to look down his nose at her and scoff.  To roll his eye at the stupid little girl shivering in fear at the edge of the world.  Instead, he stared out into the darkness and rolled the grip of his sword in his hand before saying,

“It’s one of the scariest things I’ve ever done.  I’ve fought my whole life, but there’s something about Sin...about knowing that you could fail so easily, and that it’ll all be for nothing.  It stops your heart in your chest, freezes your blood under your skin.  It’s like looking death right in the face and raising your weapon to it.”

She shivered at the flat tone of his voice, aware that, in her tenacious questioning, she’d pressed her fingers right into a fleshy trauma wound.  She didn’t know what he saw as he looked out into the field where he’d fought Sin ten years before, but she knew whatever it was couldn’t be good.  He was the only one who’d walked away alive, after all.  He could tiptoe around the subject of Sir Jecht for Tidus and Yuna’s sakes, but they all knew.  Auron was Legendary because he was the only Guardian who had ever survived the fight with Sin.

“So you don’t think being scared makes me weak?” she asked timidly.

He tore his gaze away from the distance and turned to look at her, his face softening exponentially.  She’d never seen him look at anyone like that before, and for a moment he looked like a real person.  Not a legend, not the boss.  Just a man.

“It makes you smart,” he said. “Only someone too stupid to realize how dangerous this is wouldn’t be afraid.  But you’re also one of the bravest people I’ve ever met.”

She didn’t know what to say to that.  She was so touched and relieved that she couldn’t find words for the first time in her life.  Instead, she took a few steps forward and threw her arms around his middle, pressing her face against his chest.  She felt him freeze against her, like he wasn’t sure what a hug was and had no idea how to respond, but then a hand came around to stroke up and down her back in three reassuring lengths.

They pulled away from each other as Lulu emerged from the girls’ tent, looking alarmed.   She relaxed when she saw Rikku though, shooting her a curious look but not actually asking any questions.  Tidus stumbled out of his own tent a minute later, bleary-eyed and sleep-mussed, and Rikku realized that her exhaustion had returned in full-force and she was more than ready to climb back in to her bedroll. 

She turned to look back at Auron first, though, fixing him with a smile.

“Thanks,” she said, and she almost wondered if she imagined the soft smile he gifted her with, it was there and gone so quickly.

“You’re welcome,” he said simply.

**Author's Note:**

> comments are always appreciated :)


End file.
